one of those days.

Today was one of those days...

first day back from vacation.
The first day back from vacation is never a happy feeling, but come to think of it, today wasn't half bad considering. I always picture those days as awful, early morning, slow-moving, yawn-invoking times, but today was endurable. Maybe it had something to do with all of the coffee and caffeine I had today.

running late.
All day. And for those of you who know me well, this isn't really a rare, one-day problem. It's basically the theme of my life. I'm surprised I wasn't late for my birth. It's really a chronic problem that I wish some sort of oral medication could resolve, but there's nothing to be done except turn back the clocks in my house to 20 minutes earlier some day when I'm not home. I'm kidding. But really, it all started this morning when on my slow-moving-still-feel-like-I'm-on-vacation body got out of bed. Actually, I gave myself plenty of time, but the problem is that I wasn't as quick as I usually am. Therefore, breakfast forfeited, and the apple-cinnamon oatmeal I fixed for myself was wolfed down in literally 3 large gulps. I grabbed my thermos of coffee and was out the door. I was scheduled for on-the-job training today until 11:30, and since I was driving and mastering the course of mail run, I lost all track of time. I didn't get done until 11:45 which left me with 10-15 minutes to come up with an idea for lunch before I had to be out to TR for my class that started at noon. I'm not one of these people who gives up a meal no matter what the circumstances, so I sped over to the Kmart plaza in search for food. Chinese? Takes too long. KFC? Ugh, totally not my favorite but I headed in that direction until I spotted the solution: Blimpie! I pulled into the parking lot and sighed when I saw a guy who slid into step just a few feet ahead. Bummer. I was a little bugged he got in ahead of me until he opened the door for me, and his gentleman-like character lifted my spirits. However, the sandwich artists at Blimpie today didn't get the memo that I was in a hurry, so they were moving at some sort of turtle pace. You know when you're in a hurry and the world seems to shift into slow motion? That's how I felt. I grabbed my food and hit the road, SO thankful that the construction work going on at Veterans Road (all for the sake of being able to reach Walmart at all angles of Morton) was somehow stopped at the moment and no guy in a bright orange vest was holding up a SLOW or better yet, STOP sign at me. So I made it through class and rushed home to my list of 5 phone calls that I needed to make. My friend and business partner showed up so I talked to her for a few minutes, then made the calls and shot out a few e-mails, only to find I was 10 minutes late to the Survivor Dinner I was suppossed to be at to take pictures. Fortunately, I didn't miss much, and I was able to capture some nice moments at the dinner.

cops, cops, everywhere.
Even in my reading material. I'm reading this book right now about this negotiator, and basically it's about two cops. Then today, I saw police men everywhere. And it's not that I'm thinking more about them becuase of this book, because at one point I was being followed by a police car without realizing it and then suddenly when I saw him I was very nervous that I had been speeding. He continued to follow me for awhile and then thankfully went straight when I turned. I think it's so funny that when police cars are around, everyone drives like 5-10 UNDER the speed limit. I saw several other law enforcement vehicles lurking around town tonight...hmmm...

fresh air.
I needed it badly so tonight after the dinner I hopped on my bike and started the trek toward Nautilus. The air was heavy and humid and the sky was cloudy, but somehow just pedaling on the road with the wind to my face and music in my ears set the world straight and relaxed me. Often, the art of being active is what winds me down the most. It's quite the backwards concept but it's really the truth. Heather had texted shortly within that time so I committed to ging on a walk with her when she got off work at 10pm. Another much needed session! Walking and talking has always come easily to our friendship...

i wish i was invisible.
I noticed this thought for the millionth time tonight as I was walking around at the Survivor Dinner snapping pictures. My task was to obtain pictures of people at the dinner, obviously candid ones. I love taking candid pictures all except for one problem: the people themselves are often an obstacle. Candid cannot be truly candid unless someone knows you're not there. Unfortunately I only had the 50mm lens tonight which has no zoom. YOU are the zoom. A large part of the successful photos captured with this lens are taken at a good 3-4 feet from the person, which means I can't hide in a corner and get a good picture. I have to be willing to get up close and personal. Easier said than done. I've shot enough wedding receptions to interpret the strange looks and brief stares of those mingling that are wondering, "Why is that girl with the camera taking my picture?" Of course I comfort myself with the fact that most people assume I'm a professional photographer and serve a purpose for walking around with 2 cameras strapped to myself while nudging my lens into their space, which is the truth, but sometimes I forget people might know that when I get the apprehensive stares. Then every once in awhile you get the people who immediately react and look away, cover their face, or make a face and look at you like you're holding a shot gun instead of a camera. I guess both do shoot. We do have a lens that allows you to stand a comfortable distance away and zoom in on people from quite a ways back and still get a beautiful picture, which is essential at some events. However this lens was not on me tonight. So I decided tonight that the only real solution to my problem is to become invisible. If I could walk around and get the pictures I really wanted of people being natural, unhibitied, and surrounded in laughter, it would be a beautiful thing. And on some level I eventually get there when the evening has warmed up and people forget I'm swarming around them like a bee by a honeycomb. But until then, and even then, there's still that small, inhibited behavior that resides in anyone that knows a camera is present. I know it because I've been there. And since I'm not at liberty to sit everyone I photograph down and give a speech on "forgetting I'm in the room all night," this is the situation I deal with at most events that I shoot. So obvoiusly I have found ways to overcome (i.e. buy a lens that allows you to zoom in from very far distances). And really, it's not always as hard as I'm making it sound. I just wanted to paint the picture as to how glorious it would actually be to be an invisible photographer.

That's really what I want to be when I grow up.

But I guess if it doesn't work out, a photographer will do.

inbox.
Kristi introduced me to the concept of organizing all of my emails into folders and only having what the e-mail in my inbox as my "to-do" e-mails, and then file them away as I get them done. It's an ingenious idea... when I'm actually around to keep up on it. And most of the time I am, but as mentioned before I was on a family vacation in WI Dells this weekend (good times! I'll post pictures soon), plus my life has been seriously crazy trying to keep up with 3 jobs that have all suddeny increased in busy-ness, so currently I have 42 e-mails to deal with. That's before 18 more come in tomorrow, 1/3 of which I'll immediately delete (I don't need to know about Old Navy's sale or Barnes & Nobles' latest book of the week), 1/3 of which will remain in my "to-do" inbox, and 1/3 of which I'll quickly reply to and file away if requiring immediate attention. Anyway, I heard on the radio this morning that in a work day, you should only plan on checking your e-mail once and it should NOT be first thing in the morning. Evidently that's one of your most productive, creative times, so you should start with brain-heavy work. However, e-mails should be checked once a day and stay "caught up" on so as not to pile up, perhaps around 11 am. I heard this on 106.9, my favorite morning radio talk show.

love you all!
t