A couple of random pictures I will share. Neither have anything to do w/today's post other than that they are random. I found them both in old picture archives. One was taken and edited a couple of years ago (house), while the other is a raw image file I found and edited tonight (candle).
The house one I just liked. It originally had the word "maison" (means "house" in French) in bright yellow words that sat along the angle of the roof, but I removed it. I liked the juxtaposition of the bright, Hollywood-like letters against the vintage-texture background, yet it felt too loud.
The candle picture, I remember snapping it right after I blew it out w/the intent of catching the smoke. It reminds me of the verse in the Bible that says our lives are but a vapor... so short and temporary. If you will humor me w/the analogy... our lives are like a lovely "fresh linen" or "cinnamon apple pie" scent that fills a room and warms it, affecting the space we fill, but just as quickly is blown out, leaving behind a faint scent of what used to be and no longer is.
I have a little notebook. It has a burnt orange leather-texture cover. My mom gave it to me for Christmas a few years back. On the front page, I signed my name in the upper left corner (in all lowercase) and on the center of the page I wrote:
"my little Book of thoughts, prayers, goals, scribbles, imaginations, and Life"
Dec. 2006 -
It is nowhere near finished so an end date is not listed. I love it. In it, random pages are filled with random contents, all of which reflect the description above in some way, shape, or form.
The best part about this book is that there is no order. There is no method to my madness. I simply open it up to a blank page somewhere in the book and fill it as I see fit. To some of you, this sounds utterly chaotic and unorganized. To me, it is truly freeing.
I love flipping through and finding random treasures hidden among a bunch of blank pages... something I didn't realize that I wrote, or something that I knew I did, but forgot about.
Among some of the content reads my "Life Goals." In no particular order, I started to list them. There is something interesting that happened when I started to write these... likely around 2-3 years ago. I'll extract my writing so you can see it:
"Life Goal #1- write & publish a book
1/14/07- I decided today that if I ever go on and get my Master's (degree), it will be in psychology specializing in personality so that I can counsel couples and friends in relationships.
Life Goal #2- write & publish a book
*It's interesting that I didn't realize that this is the exact same goal as #1!
Life Goal #3- Purchase a green Volkswagen Beetle. (or a mini cooper)."
From there, I have more life goals listed in which I won't share for now. What I really wanted to point out was how #1 & #2 are exactly the same goal, and I didn't even realize that I wrote it twice in a row, probably because I wrote them at different times. They were also separated by my random thought of obtaining a Master's degree in Psychology. As I look back on that now, I remember a time that I was preoccupied with that field, and I still count it and "personality types" among one of my biggest hobbies. I LOVE reading books on the topic and discussing it with anyone who will listen, and I've even been known to "personality type" people on the spot when I meet them. So it would seem as though I do fulfill this goal in a very small capacity, regardless of whether I am qualified or not! I have come to realize that this is best suited as a passion and hobby rather than a life path.
Also, I had to throw in Life Goal #3 to show that one of my goals has, indeed, been accomplished!
Anyway, about Life Goal #1 (and #2). I was at the gym a few days ago when an older lady who goes to our church approached me.
"Taryn," she said, "I think you should be... you know, those people who write. You take great pictures, but I just love how you write."
"You mean... an author?" I asked.
"YES! An author."
I smiled. "Why do you say that... did you read my blog?"
"Well, it was pulled up the other day and I was reading it, so I think you should write something."
I didn't tell her that I have been writing stories since I could hold a pencil in my hand, or that I used to write and illustrate books in my free time at school. I didn't tell her that my one love and passion in life, in addition to capturing images, is to write stories, to write about life, to write about what happens. I didn't tell her that writing to me is like therapy, and without it I wouldn't be the same. I didn't tell her that I have countless poems and short stories started and not finished, or completed but not used. I didn't tell her about my Life Goals #1 & #2.
I just smiled, and was flattered.
I told my cousin today that I really do want to write a book, but it probably won't happen until I'm in my 40s.
"More of like a mid-life crisis project," I told her.
"Would it be fiction or non-fiction?" she asked.
"Fiction," I told her. "Non-fiction takes too much research. Although... so does fiction."
"Fiction based on non-fiction?" she asked with a clever smile.
"Yes, realistic fiction," I told her.
"Like Anne (of Green Gables) did... how she wrote about Avonlea. About her life, but a story."
And the way I see it, I'll have to wait until I'm older until I have enough life experience, wisdom, stories, and insight to share. These days, that isn't feeling so far off. It's not that I wouldn't love to write a story now, but I just don't feel ready. Besides, my passion and calling now is photography and my business, and there is a large amount of writing that I get to tie in there. Not counting my personal blogging and what-not :)
Anyway, my main goal in writing and publishing a book is to do it for the glory of God. I don't necessarily think I'll write a sermon or a bible study, but I do want it to be powerful and effective spiritually. I trust the Lord will give me the wisdom to do that, and nudge me when the time is right!
Love you all,