I plan to go through all the pictures of year 2008 and 2009 and create "year in review" books to get printed. Unfortunately, I underestimated how long this process actually takes, and 2 hours later, I only had about 6 pages created. I had expected to be a lot further along. I know these books are something I will love and cherish upon completion, but until then, they are looming above my head as another item on my "personal to-do list" that keeps stressing me out.
I'm sitting in my bedroom now, ready to relax for the evening and read a good book that I've been enjoying. However, thoughts of all the other stuff I want to get done keep surfacing. I'm reminded of a bible study I am going through right now, called "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World." My business partner/friend and I are doing it together, as she tends to be a Martha and I tend to be a Mary. However, the last chapter we covered would tend to speak of me otherwise. It was about "taking on too much."
A story was told about a young person willing to serve the Lord.
"I'll do anything for you," she says.
"Ok," Jesus replied, "Please take this wagon to the top of the mountain, and carry this one small rock in it."
As the young girl heads up the mountain, one of her friends stops her and asks, "Are you going to the top of the mountain?"
"Yes," she replies.
"Great! Would you mind taking these pebbles for me?"
"No problem," she says, and loads them into her wagon. She continues, and runs across someone else.
"Hey," he says, "Will you also take with you this boulder?"
"Oh, sure," the young girl says, "I don't think the Lord would mind."
As she heads up, more and more add their rocks to her wagon. Pretty soon, what started out as an easy, endurable task becomes almost impossible. She is practically dragging the wagon, slumping from the weight of it all. She cries out to God.
"Lord," she says, "Why did you make this so hard?"
"I didn't," He said, "I only asked you to bring up the one small rock."
It goes to show that even though there are countless opportunities in our lives to take on, and most of them are good things, it doesn't mean we should. This is especially hard for me to process. I love doing stuff for people, especially if it means using my creative services. However, just because there is a need, it doesn't mean I have to be the one to fill it every time. Often, when we jump at every opportunity even when we aren't called to do it, we steal the blessing from someone else.
I have a tendency to overcommit in a lot of areas, failing to recognize the amount of time or effort that is required, and then I am overloaded and overwhelmed. Such as now. I have committed myself to multiple projects for others, as well as assigned my own self a huge list of "must get done" projects, and when I add up the sum of them, I become bewildered.
The chapter in Martha & Mary encouraged those of us who struggle with taking on too much to practice "dropping some rocks" by going through the list of projects, prioritizing everything with a 1, 2, or 3, and then dropping all the 3s. I am horrified to think of doing such a thing, but it would definitely benefit me to spend maximum energy and creative potential on projects I have rather than spread myself too thin.
Time to unload!
Love you all...